TheDude @ LCS Postat Februarie 16 Autor Postat Februarie 16 How are migrating birds different from flies? Answer: Birds fly, but flies don’t bird.
TheDude @ LCS Postat Februarie 18 Autor Postat Februarie 18 What month is the shortest of the year? May, it only has three letters.
TheDude @ LCS Postat Februarie 18 Autor Postat Februarie 18 Why do we tell actors to "break a leg?" Because every play has a cast.
TheDude @ LCS Postat Februarie 19 Autor Postat Februarie 19 Having a brother as their best friend is like winning the biggest jackpot in the world.
TheDude @ LCS Postat Februarie 20 Autor Postat Februarie 20 A wealthy, but stingy father was trying to put a birthday party together for his 23 y/o daughter. Long He wanted the party to be extravagant, but wanted to spend as little money as possible. He had finished all of the other decorations, and he was left to work on the cake. "Why not get it ordered from an upscale bakery?" his wife said. So the father visited a ton of different bakeries and did research, but found the prices to be too high. My daughter is inviting all of her friends, and I'll look bad if I don't put together a good cake, he thought. Then, he stumbled upon a shop that opened once a year to provide free cake to its customers. How quaint, the father thought, but desperate, he walked inside to see if they could provide a cake for his daughter's birthday. He was met by a Buddhist monk chanting and lighting incense. "Hello," the father asked, "I would like to buy a cake." "Of course," the monk replied, "just draw a picture of the cake you would like on the notepad on the desk." The father thought this to be weird, but wanting to save as much money as possible, he gave him the address and told him to come in the backdoor, just in case the cake was bad. The day of the party arrived and the monk visited the house with the most extravagant cake the family had ever seen. All of the guests were in awe, and whispered to each other about how much the cake could have cost. The monk became the guest of honor and at the end of the party, the father approached the monk and asked, "Why do you do this for free? You should take money for your services!" The monk smiled and said, "I do this for free because a cake day is the best way to earn karma." The daughter and one of her friends overheard this and the daughter repeated the monk's response to the friend. "I know, I just heard him say that." her friend responded. "Yes," the daughter said, "but repeating a joke on your cake day is the second best way to earn karma."
TheDude @ LCS Postat Februarie 20 Autor Postat Februarie 20 An experiment Scientists removed the left half of a man's brain and asked him to count to 10. He said, "2, 4, 6, 8, 10." Then they put it back, and removed the right half of his brain and asked him to count to 10 He said, "1, 3, 5, 7, 9." Finally they removed his entire brain and asked him to count to 10. He says: 'Oh I can count to 10. Believe me People are saying I can count to 10 better than anyone in the history of our country. If you ask me to count to 10. I will count to 10 the likes of which no one has ever seen before."
TheDude @ LCS Postat Februarie 21 Autor Postat Februarie 21 Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because he felt crummy.
TheDude @ LCS Postat Februarie 21 Autor Postat Februarie 21 What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
TheDude @ LCS Postat Februarie 22 Autor Postat Februarie 22 Why couldn't the bicycle stand up? It was two-tired. Why did the math book look sad? It had too many problems Source.
TheDude @ LCS Postat Februarie 22 Autor Postat Februarie 22 What do you call a space magician? A flying saucerer Source. Why was there a bug in the computer? It was looking for a byte to eat
TheDude @ LCS Postat Februarie 23 Autor Postat Februarie 23 Joke: What were prehistoric sleepovers called? Answer: Dino-SNORES. Joke: What’s a bee’s favorite musical? Answer: Stinging in the Rain. Joke: What kind of cow wears a crown? Answer: A dairy queen.
TheDude @ LCS Postat Februarie 23 Autor Postat Februarie 23 Joke: What do turkeys like to eat for dessert? Answer: Apple Gobbler. Joke: Why do storks have so little money? Answer: They have such big bills. Joke: Which reptile always knows what time it is? Answer: A grandfather croc.
TheDude @ LCS Postat Februarie 24 Autor Postat Februarie 24 Joke: How do birds fly in the rain? Answer: They use wing shield wipers. Joke: How do birds keep in shape? Answer: They do a lot of eggs-ercises.
TheDude @ LCS Postat Februarie 24 Autor Postat Februarie 24 Joke: How do bulls pay for their groceries? Answer: They charge them. Joke: How do cats keep their breath fresh? Answer: They use mouse wash.
TheDude @ LCS Postat Februarie 25 Autor Postat Februarie 25 Joke: Did you hear the story about the skunk? Answer: Never mind–it stinks. Joke: How are migrating birds different from flies? Answer: Birds fly, but flies don’t bird.
TheDude @ LCS Postat Februarie 25 Autor Postat Februarie 25 Joke: How can you make your money go far? Answer: Put your piggy bank in outer space. Joke: How can you tell if a bee is talking on a cell phone? Answer: You get a buzzy signal.
TheDude @ LCS Postat Februarie 26 Autor Postat Februarie 26 Joke: How can you tell which end of a worm is the head? Answer: Tickle it in the middle, see which end laughs. Joke: How can you tell worms from spaghetti? Answer: Worms can hang on to your fork.
TheDude @ LCS Postat Februarie 26 Autor Postat Februarie 26 Joke: How come frogs are such good liars? Answer: Because they’re amFIBians. Joke: How did one calf finish his math problems faster than the other calves? Answer: It used a COW-culator.
TheDude @ LCS Postat Februarie 27 Autor Postat Februarie 27 Joke: How did the duck get rid of its headache? Answer: With quack-upuncture. Joke: How did the farmer count his herd of cattle? Answer: He used a COWculator.
TheDude @ LCS Postat Februarie 27 Autor Postat Februarie 27 Joke: How did the frog cross the road? Answer: Its cousin toad it. Joke: How did the hammerhead shark do on his math test? Answer: He nailed it.
TheDude @ LCS Postat Februarie 28 Autor Postat Februarie 28 Joke: How did the horse get a soda? Answer: He gave the vending machine a buck. Joke: How did the snake escape from jail? Answer: It scaled the wall.
TheDude @ LCS Postat Februarie 28 Autor Postat Februarie 28 Joke: How do baby geese get out of their shells? Answer: They follow eggs-it signs. Joke: How do birds fly in the rain? Answer: They use wing shield wipers.
TheDude @ LCS Postat Martie 1 Autor Postat Martie 1 Joke: How do birds keep in shape? Answer: They do a lot of eggs-ercises. Joke: How do bulls pay for their groceries? Answer: They charge them.
TheDude @ LCS Postat Martie 1 Autor Postat Martie 1 Joke: How do cats keep their breath fresh? Answer: They use mouse wash. Joke: How do chickens keep in shape? Answer: They do lots of EGGSercises.
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